Aloe Bud

When I turned 25, my marriage was over and I was totally lost. I had started to finally feel like an adult in the most terrible way. Everything that I had been before was gone, and all I wanted was to create a new person out of what had been left behind. I wanted to be somebody different, someone unburdened by self hatred over having a failed relationship.

I finally felt ready to try something a little more daring for my best friend’s wedding. I bought Taylor Swift’s signature color, “Dragon Girl” by NARS. It was the perfect blue-red pencil to match the dress I had gotten for the occasion. It was the beginning of my love of red lipstick. This little pencil brought me so much joy. It helped me feel vibrant and exciting when I needed a change of pace. I didn’t want to blend into the background anymore — I wanted to stand out. It was amazing how something so small could help me feel so much more secure in who I was.

After that, red became my signature color. So now I can flirt shamelessly, or be bold enough to talk to someone I don’t know. It gives me the confidence to be someone who isn’t afraid of anything, someone who knows what they want and who they are. Maybe even someone who has their life together, or is at least on their way there. I can be the woman that I want to be in this lipstick. With each new shade of red, I feel capable of anything.

I’m single again now at age 27. I was lucky to have had something so wonderful, and it changed me for the better. My relationship was beautiful, but it wasn’t meant to last. I’m trying to find my way back to the confidence I used to have, but I will always have red lipstick to help me fake it until I do.